Guest List

It's October 2.  3 weeks until our wedding.  1 day after our RSVP deadline.  43% of our guests have not RSVP'd.  That's annoying, you guys. 

I know that many other brides have lamented this in the past, but... Seriously!  How hard is it?  Write your name on a card, check the little line that says you're coming or you're not, and pick a meal.  Slide said card into the self-addressed stamped envelope and drop it in the mail!  Come on!  It's so rude to assume that if you're not coming you don't need to send in the reply.  Um, last time I checked, I am not a mind-reader.  So while you may assume that's appropriate behavior, I am not assuming you're not coming.  Instead, I am panicking about what I'm going to do if you do show up.  

I wish it was more acceptable to hire a bouncer to stand outside the reception with a guest list.  If you're not on the list, you don't come in.  That's it.  If you can't be bothered to do something as simple as mail in a card, then I can't be bothered to worry about feeding you on my parents' dime.  Unfortunately, bouncers are "frowned-upon" in the wedding world.  Which I totally get.  You usually see bouncers on shows like Bridezillas where there is some crazy family feud or something.  Or on Platinum Weddings where there are some VIPs expected to attend and security is a concern.  Our wedding is neither of those things.  And I am not about to be labeled a Bridezilla.  I think I've been pretty laid back and low-key through this whole process.  But this is really getting my panties in a wad.

Granted my parents have been out of town this week, so there are likely some additional response cards waiting for them in their mail, which they'll get to tomorrow.  But I highly doubt that all 74 of our so-far-unreceived responses are in there.  And it's annoying.  But, it is what it is.  We'll start making phone calls and sending emails and facebook messages to people to make sure we get their responses.  And if they never answer?  Well, then hopefully they won't be surprised when they show up and have no where to sit and have to go out to dinner instead of eating the amazing food that JDK is cooking up for us.

Registry Thoughts

Apparently, there are people out there who don't like registries.  They think they are greedy.  They think that "expecting" guests to buy you gifts is bratty. 

I think that's just silly.  Look, your guests want to buy you something.  It may as well be something you've chosen to coordinate with your home decor or that you'll actually use, rather than some weird lamp from Italy that only Ralphie's dad would be proud to display.

(source)

And, as long as you're giving your guests the option to buy you things ranging in price from $5 to $500, I hardly think that that's being greedy. 

When it came time to deciding about where we would register, the answer was pretty obvious to me: Bed, Bath, and Beyond.  I had worked there all through grad school (as a Registry Consultant) and know they have a great program, plus I covet about 90% of the items in that store.  However, Matt and I have been living on our own for 7 years (give or take).  We have almost everything we need - dishes, pots, pans, kitche appliances, sheets, towels, etc.  And almost everything we have is old.  Some of it is as old as I am.  Seriously.  A lot of it is stuff that Matt inherited from his grandparents, or that I got from my step-dad when he and my mom got married.  Almost all of it is hand-me-downs from somewhere.  And it looked it.  And acted like it.  So it was time to upgrade.  And that's what we did - we went to BBBY (as my former colleagues and I liked to call it) and we upgraded.  Nicer, non-stick pots and pans, plastic utensils that won't scratch our non-stick pots, dishes that match...you get the drift.  

Since I had been a registry consultant, the consultant we met with left us to our own devices.  We were handed a shopping list (which I totally didn't need) and the scanning gun.  I expected Matt to be like most boys and totally get into the whole gun thing, but he didn't!  He used it for a bit and then handed it off to me.  Which was fine - I always loved when couples wanted me to come with them and scan things for them, and I loved it even more when I got to scan my own stuff.  (Duh!)  We spent about 2 hours there our first time, and had a blast.  We've since added or deleted things online, too (another major bonus).  Which also means that I have been stalking.  Woops!

But The Powers That Be in the wedding world tell you to have at least 2 registries.  Give your guests some variety.  Well, we already registered for everything we needed at BBBY, so other "brick-and-mortar" stores seemed silly.  I considered an Amazon.com registry, but...meh.  I couldn't get excited about it.  Then I remembered that when my sister got married, they had a honeymoon registry.  Ding ding ding!!!  It seems, however, that honeymoon registries are met with even more disdain than a traditional registry.  But here's the way Matt and I looked at it.  We're not askign people to buy us our honeymoon - that was booked and paid for already.  What we're registering for are upgrades and excursions.  We'll probably be content to just lay around the beach/pool at the resort, but that can get kind of old, even for a burned-out social worker.  So by registering for excursions, we're giving people the opportunity to make our honeymoon even more special.  I bought my sister and her hubby a golf game for their honeymoon, and they loved it!  Our thank you card included a picture of them on the golf course - it was great!  I loved knowing that they had fun and made a great memory with something that I bought for them.  So that's what I have to say to all the honeymoon registry naysayers out there!

I did some research and found that Honeyfund.com had the best options - the most variety of layouts, ability to customize or choose a predetermined registry, no fees for having the registry, and the lowest transaction fees.  Honeyfund also provides options to our guests.  They can decide how to pay (PayPal, check, or bank deposit) and they can decide how we're notified.  All in all, we thought it seemed like the best option.  We sat down and perused the excursions that Sandals Halcyon has to offer.  We also looked at the excursions that the other 2 Sandals resorts on St. Lucia offer, because of their whole "Stay at 1, Play at 3" deal.  We chose a good number of options, and started putting together our registry on Honeyfund.  Another great thing about Honeyfund is that you can break large gifts down into smaller increments.  For example, for 2 people, the Soufriere Adventure Cruise is $240.  I doubt that most of our guests would be willing to spend that much on a honeymoon tour for us, so we broke it down into 4 $60 gifts.  We did that with several of our tours (ps - Sandals excursions are kinda pricey!).  

So that's it! Our two registries!  So far we have gotten a few gifts from our Honeyfund and of course we got several gifts from our BBBY registry at the shower.  We're really pleased with the customer service at both and hope that our guests like the options we've given them. 

OOTs!

That would be Out of Town (bags) for those of you who don't speak wedding. I just like to say OOT. It makes me giggle. Cuz I'm 4.

ANYWAY. Our out of town bags have been given significant consideration. And by that, I mean that I've been obsessing and Matt has been looking at me thinking, "Who are you and what have you done with my normal fiance?" Whatever. I want our guests to be wowed as soon as they check into the hotel. To know that they're in for a great weekend. To know that we appreciate that they've traveled, spent money, and taken time out of our lives to celebrate with us.

Apparently, I also want them....to get fat. Because here's what I've come up with. First up? To represent where we currently live, each bag will get 2 miniature pretzels from the Philly Pretzel Factory.

Say you: Pretzels?! Who cares about pretzels?
Say me: Hush, you. If you've never had one, you don't know. And hey - at least I'm not trying to stuff a cheesesteak in there (don't think it didn't cross my mind)! [Blogger tried to tell me that cheesesteak was 2 words. Silly Blogger]

Seriously, though. I used to be strictly an Auntie Anne's pretzel girl. No trip to the mall was complete without a stop at the Auntie Anne's shop. And then? I moved to Philly and had my first taste of the Philly Pretzel Factory pretzel. Umm...yeah...mind - blown. If there ever was a perfect food, this might be it. Ok, that might be an exaggeration, but...you get the point. These things are freaking awesome. Anyway, we tested it out at home to see how they held up in storage (a ziploc), and they did pretty well, but we're definitely going the unsalted route; the salt kind of liquefied and made the pretzels a bit gooey. So yeah, our guests will each get an unsalted Philly Pretzel Factory mini. I'm jealous of them already.

Next? I came across this little set on a another blog, and immediately had to have it.

(source)

ACK! How fabulous are these? Cookie cutters that you can customize with your own messages! Each guest will get a cookie, too. Homemade with a special message from me and Matt. I plan to start baking and freezing them soon, and then thaw and decorate a week or so before the wedding. Thank you, Williams Sonoma. I have always loved you.

And, of course, no wedding in Hershey would be complete without some Hersheys love. We haven't decided which product to use, though. I think we should go with the classic Hershey bar, but I could also be convinced to change it up a bit. We'll see once we get there and it's time to fill the bags.

We're also going to include a bottle of water for each guest because, well, who doesn't need one of those after a superfun wedding? I'm also going to put together a small little "emergency kit" with travel-sized packs of Tylenol, Advil, Tums, and band-aids. I haven't decided if I'm going to do something cute with the kits, or just throw things into a ziploc bag. Time will determine that, I think.

I hand-drew a couple maps of the area, including one that has a specified Wedding Day Route so that guests know exactly how to get from the hotel, to the ceremony, and back to the hotel/reception site. We'll throw in a thank-you from me and Matt, and some brochures about area fun stuff!

As for the bags themselves, I'll just pick some gift bags up at the Paper Factory or something. And then I downloaded a custom monogram from the WeddingChicks blog. They have tons of stuff, so if you're planning a wedding and want to go the DIY route but aren't creative enough to actually design something, definitely check them out! Bonus: they're all FREE!

So that's it! All the contents of our OOTs! I can't wait to get started on the baking, and hope that our guests will love them as much as I've loved planning them!