Chasing Cars - The Ceremony

The girls were hidden away in our room, and the boys had finished seating the guests.  Matt's mom was escorted down the aisle by his brothers, with his dad following behind.

My mom was next, escorted by my step-dad, Jeff.

Then David came to tell us that it was time.  We lined up in the hallway.  I was giddy.  Nervous.  Excited.  Kinda had to pee.  My girls kept turning around and smiling at me.  David was giving me reassuring smiles.  My dad just kept holding my hand.  The boys took their places at the front.  The coordinator instructed the girls down the aisle, one by one.  Suddenly, we were ready.  The coordinator fixed my train and sent us on our way.  My groom was waiting for me.

photo from Karen

My dad and I reached the front.  We had decided not to do the whole "giving away" part of the ceremony.  It seems antiquated to me, and I am not a piece of property to be handed off from my father to my husband.  So my dad hugged me, shook Matt's hand, and took his seat.

[Funny story: during rehearsal, my dad sort of kept his hand on my butt when "handing me off."  I warned him not to do it at the ceremony.  He did.  I yelled at him.  When he sat down, leaned over to my mom and said "I can't believe I did that!"  You can hear it on the video.  You can see me laughing about it below]

Pastor Cindy started the ceremony with the greeting and a prayer, then welcomed our guests to the ceremony.  Then Matt and I said our declaration of intention: Erin, will you have Matthew to be your husband, to live together in the covenant of marriage?  Will you love him, comfort him, honor and keep him, in sickness and in health, and, forsaking all others, be faithful to him as long as you both shall live?  I will.

She then asked our families to declare their intent to help and support us in our marriage: Families, friends, and all those gathered here with Matthew and Erin, will you support and care for them, sustain and pray for them in times of trouble, give thanks with them in times of joy, honor the bonds of their covenant, and affirm the love of God reflected in their life together?  We will.

The readings.  For the first reading, we chose Ecclesiastes 4:9-12.  We asked Matt's cousin's wife, Denita, to read it for us.  Matt is close with this cousin, and I have come to consider Denita to be one of my very good friends. Two are better than one, because they have good return for their work: If one falls down, his friend can help him up.  But pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up!  Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm.  But how can one keep warm alone?  Though one may be overwhelmed, two can defend themselves.  A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.

My brother-in-law was our next reader.  We asked him to read "Union," by Robert Fulghum.  It's a very popular reading, and it spoke to us about the evolution and development of our relationship: You have known each other from the first glance of acquaintance to this point of committment.  At some point, you decided to marry.  From that moment of yes, to this moment of yes, indeed, you have been making commitments in an informal way... Look at one another and remember this moment in time.  Before this moment you have been many things to one another - acquaintance, friend, companion, lover, dancing partner, even teacher, for you have learned much from one another these past few years.  Shortly, you shall say a few words that will you across a threshold of life, and things between you will never be quite the same.  For after today you shall say to the world - This is my husband.  This is my wife.

For the third reading we chose 1 John 4:7-12.  Matt's cousin Beth read this one.  Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God.  Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God.  Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love...Dear friends, since God so loved us, we also ought to love one another.  No one has ever seen God; but if we love one another, God lives in us and his love is made complete in us.

Pastor Cindy gave the homily next, speaking to the power of love and importance of God's love in our relationships.

Then it came time for the vows.  If you want to know how I felt during that moment, read this.  Matt got through his fine, but I definitely didn't make it.  I gasped, cried, laughed...it was hysterical.  And perfect.

Trying to hold it together

Starting to lose it

Lost it.  Tissues from cleavage

I love how you can see the GM reaching for tissues.  Matt told Steve to bring some.  He knew I'd need them.

Pastor Cindy, trying to calm me down

I, Erin, take you, Matthew, to be my husband, my partner in life, and my one true love.  I will cherish our union and love you more each day than I did the day before.  I will trust you and respect you, laugh with you and cry with you, loving you faithfully through the good times and the bad, regardless of the obstacles we may face together.  I give you my hand, my heart, and my love, from this day forward, for as long as we both shall live.

We exchanged rings.

Matthew, I give you this ring as a sign of my love and faithfulness.

Pastor Cindy gave the acclamation and pronounced us husband and wife, and it was finally time to kiss!

Pastor Cindy closed the ceremony with the marriage blessing and the Lord's Prayer, a final blessing, and the dismissal.

Matt and I walked back up the aisle together.  Husband and wife.  Newlyweds.  Partners for life.

Followed by our bridal party, we were inundated with hugs and congratulations from all our friends.  Then we rushed back into the sanctuary to dismiss all of our guests.  I'm disappointed that our photographers got no pictures of this, because it would have been a fantastic opportunity to document all of our loved ones who made the trip to celebrate with us.

Once every guest was ushered out the door, we took some formal portraits...

*All photos, unless otherwise noted, courtesy of Everlasting Images

DIY - Five Down!

The programs are finished!  Woo-hoo!  I can cross that one off my big long to-do list!  So, here's a quick little lesson on how I did them.

I downloaded the template from Aylee Bits.  At first I downloaded the bigger one, but after playing around with it, I could not get it to print right.  So I went back and downloaded the smaller one, and that one worked better.  I still had to play around with it a bit, but eventually got it to work.  I honestly couldn't tell you exactly what I did.  I just played until it worked.  Anyway, once I got it to the point where it all printed right, I started playing around with the ceremony wording.  I finally got it situated so that I liked the way it was laid out - cover, then the ceremony on 2 blades, then the VIPs on the next 2 blades, and the last blade has our thank you and the Apache Wedding blessing, which I have always loved.  

I ordered the paper from http://www.paperandmore.com/.  I highly recommend this website for all your wedding paper needs.  They are easy to work with, and have a huge selection.  You can order samples before you make your actual purchase, too, so you know you're getting exactly what you want.  And shipping is super quick!  Aylee Bits calls for 100# cardstock, but it didn't run through my printer well.  Plus, I liked the look of the 80# one better.  So it worked out.  I ended up getting the 80# Linen cardstock in Natural Cream.  

I printed (and printed....and printed....) about 10 fans at a time so as not to totally overwhelm myself.  Matt didn't really help too much with these, but I didn't really want him to - I had a whole system set up for myself and just felt I could handle it best myself.  So here are all the supplies I used:

Self-healing cutting mat, exacto knife, eyelet setter, rotary trimmer, and eyelets (I used the 3/16" size).  First step - cut the straight edges with the rotary trimmer:

Next step, use the Exacto knife and the cutting mat (it doesn't have to be a self-healing one, but they're pretty cool!) to cut the rounded top and bottom edges:

And finally, use the eyelet setter to punch the hole and then set the eyelet.  Finished product?

Sorry for the white-out, but...well, you know.  Anyway, I really like the way they turned out.  Since I started making them, I've seen some pictures of fans with opposing colored blades, and I kind of wish I had done that.  But Matt likes them the way they are, so that's good enough for me.

*all personal photos

Ceremony Readings Continued...

Last time, I revealed the non-religious reading that Matt chose for our ceremony. That left us to figure out what Bible verses we wanted to include. As I mentioned, we had to have one reading from the Bible, plus the Gospel. We looked to a lot of places for inspiration, including the booklet we were given by the church and the internet.

We wanted to find a passage that really spoke to us and that spoke to not only our relationship with each other, but our relationship with God. As I've mentioned, neither one of us could really be considered terribly religious, but we do have beliefs and live our lives according to those. We wanted whatever readings we chose to reflect those beliefs. I was pretty adamant that I did not want any passage that had to do with the wife submitting to the husband, which ruled out quite a few "suggested" verses. To me, that is not a marriage. I also didn't really want to use anything that talked about how the couple is no longer two people - I don't like that it vaguely suggests of losing your identity because of getting married. I also didn't want to use Corinthians. Not that I don't think it's a lovely verse - I do. But it's been used at almost every wedding I've been to, and, well...we like to be different. I might've mentioned that before, too.

So we ended up choosing Ecclesiastes 4:9-12.

Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their work:
If one falls down, his friend can help him up. But pity the man who falls
and has no one to help him up! Also, if two lie down together, they will
keep warm. But how can one keep warm alone? Though one may be
overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not
quickly broken.

We like how it spoke of being together and being able to support and protect one another. That's what our relationship is to us - a mutual supporting of each other - helping each other through difficult times and being happy for each other in good times. This is what we hope our marriage will continue to be - a partnership.

For the Gospel, we chose 1 John 4:7-12.

Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone
who loves has been born of God and knows God. Whoever does not love does
not know God, because God is love. This is how God showed his love among
us: He sent his one and only Son into the world that we might live through
him. This is love: not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent
his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins. Dear friends, since God so
loved us, we also ought to love one another. No one has ever seen God; but
if we love one another, God lives in us and his love is made complete in us.

We chose this because it speaks of sacrifice and compromise in the name if love. I'm sure that we all know all too well that sometimes you have to sacrifice something in order to show your partner how much you care for them - whether it it's something as simple as giving up a tv show you like or moving across the country to be together. Matt and I do feel like we have made some small sacrifices for each other, but all have been worth it to keep our relationship - our love - strong.

Choosing our reading was not as difficult as we thought it would be. We're really happy with what we've chosen, and think that they all reflect who we are as a couple.

Ceremony Readings

When we first met with our Pastor, we had absolutely no idea what our ceremony would look like. All we knew was we wanted it to be short and to the point. We definitely did not want a whole service with communion and all that stuff. With neither of us being extremely religious, we didn't really feel like a full ceremony would be right. Nor would it feel like us. We mentioned our feelings to our Pastor, and she said that there are certain things that we have to have in the ceremony because it's in the church, but there definitely were things that we could cut out. She gave us a general outline of what the ceremony would include. She also gave us a booklet that included several options for each part of the ceremony - from the greeting to the dismissal, we could customize the wedding to be how we wanted. But, of course, the real customization comes from the reading. And Matt and I worked really hard trying to decide what to include.

Pastor Cindy said that we had to have one Bible verse plus the Gospel. We could add an additional reading if we wanted to. We both decided that we wanted to - again, with us not being religious, we could use the additional reading to make the ceremony really ours. So I scoured the internet and went through song lyrics and poems and book passages. Most of my inspiration came from indiebride. Seriously, if you're looking for a non-traditional reading, you MUST check out that list. They have put together 18 pages of options. I made up a list of my favorite 7 or 8, and then left the final decision up to Matt. I am thrilled with the one he ended up choosing. It's "Union," by Robert Fulghum, and I think it speaks perfectly to our relationship:

You have known each other from the first glance of acquaintance to this point of commitment. At some point, you decided to marry. From that moment of yes to this moment of yes, indeed, you have been making promises and agreements in an informal way. All those conversations that were held riding in a car or over a meal or during long walks - all those sentences that began with “When we’re married” and continued with “I will and you will and we will”- those late night talks that included “someday” and “somehow” and “maybe”- and all those promises that are unspoken matters of the heart. All these common things, and more, are the real process of a wedding. The symbolic vows that you are about to make are a way of saying to one another, “ You know all those things we’ve promised and hoped and dreamed- well, I meant it all, every word.” Look at one another and remember this moment in time. Before this moment you have been many things to one another- acquaintance, friend, companion, lover, dancing partner, and even teacher, for you have learned much from one another in these last few years. Now you shall say a few words that take you across a threshold of life, and things will never quite be the same between you. For after these vows, you shall say to the world, this- is my husband, this- is my wife.

I absolutely love it. And what's even better is that Matt loves it. He was really excited when he read it, and thought it was perfect for us. We've asked my brother-in-law to do this reading for us. While he's only been my brother-in-law for 2 years, he's been a part of my family for what feels like forever. It was only natural to include him in our ceremony in some way.

Stay tuned for our other readings...

DIY - Two Down!

I had absolutely no intention of giving myself another DIY project. None, I tell you. And yet, as I was perusing Weddingbee, I came across the post of one Miss Frog and found myself desperately wanting to do cute little tissue packets.

People are going to cry at our wedding. I mean, not to sound, like, whatever, but they will. It's been a long time coming, we've been through some serious stuff, and people are crazy happy that we're finally taking this next step. Not that people aren't usually crazy happy about people getting married, but...whatever. You get the point. Not to mention, we have friends/families who are really emotional. I mean it. My mom and I cry at commercials. It's sick. So yeah...there will be plenty of tears during our ceremony. People might as well have something cute to cry into, right?

I echoed most of what Miss Frog did. After looking at both Michael's and A.C. Moore, I decided that I should also check out ebay for the glassine envelopes. I ended up getting them there, ordering 3 sets of 20, for about $4. I honestly didn't think I'd use them all, but I thought, "Well, it'll be good to have extra." And I got ribbon from Michael's - I ended up using 2 spools each of brown and green - only $2. I found the tissues at Target - I bought 2 packs of 60 tissues for $2. I also picked up address labels at Target - 10 pages of 80 labels for about $5.

I stuffed 2 miniature tissues into each glassine envelope, then tied a ribbon around it (like a present). I put the bow on the side where the envelope is open, so people can open up the ribbon and easily open the envelope without having to deal with the sticker. I printed the stickers with a cute little saying I came across on another Weddingbee post (I'm a little bit, possibly unhealthily, obsessed with that blog) - "Tears of joy, tears of laughter, tears of happily ever after..." I placed one sticker across the "intersection" of the ribbon. Finished product:

I mean, not to toot my horn or anything, but...how cute are they? I'm planning to put them in a basket draped with ivory or navy blue fabric - whatever I happen to have readily available (it just might end up being a pillowcase....shhhh....). They'll be at the front of the church, so people can grab a packet as they're heading into the wedding. I can't wait to see people tearing into them during our ceremony, and wiping away their tears of joy...